This “Top 12 Reasons to Vote Democrat” list has been around for a while and the source is unknown but it’s spot on and hilarious!
#1. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my Labrador
#2. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15% isn’t.
#3. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.
#4. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.
#5. I vote Democrat because I’m way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves.
#6. I vote Democrat because people who can’t tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in 10 years if we don’t start driving Prius.
#7. I vote Democrat because I’m not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy.
#8. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we should take away Social Security from those who paid into it.
#9. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party sees fit.
#10. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.
#11. I vote Democrat because I think it’s better to pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher, or fish here in America. We don’t care about the beetles, gophers, or fish in those other countries.
#12. I vote Democrat because my head is so firmly misplaced toward the south end of my body, it’s unlikely that i’ll ever have another point of view.